Sam Hollyday's News: October 2017

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

How Trumps healthcare order will affect people with disabilities

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The end of the fiscal year last week finalized the Republican’s failure to repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act and, after a long summer chock full of die-ins and marches protesting the Republicans’ proposed health care policies, the disability rights community more than deserved a breather. But only eight days later, on Oct. 12, Trump signed a health care executive order meant to undermine and dismantle Obamacare. According to CNN, the executive order “would allow consumers to buy short-term policies, which don’t have to comply with Obamacare’s protections for those with pre-existing conditions.” Essentially, with this executive order, many disabled people, and the protections they receive through the ACA, will be seriously impacted.

Trump’s executive order is predicted to be part of a larger plan to gut Obamacare — a plan being called a “synthetic repeal.” The term was coined on Twitter by Andy Slavitt, who served as Acting Administrator for the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services during the last two years of Obama’s presidency. Slavitt believes following the Oct. 12 order, the Trump administration will continue to destabilize the health marketplace — without the help of Congress — until the ACA fails. In response to Trump’s executive order and the possible backdoor repeal, Bustle spoke with Stacy Stanford, a disability rights advocate and community organizer who works with Utah Health Policy Project.

Though the executive order and possible “synthetic repeal” will negatively affect many marginalized communities, it poses an especially great risk to people with disabilities. Stanford tells Bustle, “Introducing more options for healthy people to buy less-comprehensive coverage, removed from the protections of the Affordable Care Act, only increases the burden on sick and disabled people.” By effectively giving non-disabled people the choice to buy insurance plans that include less coverage, premiums for disabled people will increase dramatically.

Today's Executive Order on Healthcare Choice Undermines States and Hurts Mental Health https://t.co/MGYOiM8d8d http://pic.twitter.com/rSgQzZwIJN

— MentalHealthAmerica (@MentalHealthAm) October 12, 2017

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This past summer, experts predicted if repeal and replace was successfully passed, those with pre-existing conditions would face skyrocketing medical expenses — people with kidney cancer could expect a 703 percent surcharge, while those who had a major depressive order would face a 208 percent surcharge. Trump’s health care executive order will create similar circumstances for the disability community. “Disabled folks cannot shop around for cheaper, skimpier insurance options,” says Stanford. “We must buy plans that cover our care needs, or face losing access to treatment because we cannot afford the soaring costs that will come when healthy people flee the market.” If this happens, many disabled people will not be able to afford health insurance plans, and therefore could face dismal, and potentially fatal, consequences.

When one in five Americans experience mental health issues, the executive order’s possible effect on accessible mental health treatment is particularly alarming. Stanford explains to Bustle, “Nobody is immune to mental illness, and folks who sign up for bare-bones insurance while they are healthy may find themselves in the middle of a psychiatric crisis, without coverage for prescription drugs, hospitalization, or mental health treatment.” Stanford also worries this possible lack of coverage could prove to be life-threatening, especially if a mentally ill person becomes suicidal, yet cannot receive inpatient treatment. The organization Mental Health America swiftly released a statement condemning Trump’s executive order, stating that it “falls short” of providing mentally ill people with proper healthcare.

Moreover, Stanford believes the fight for disability rights goes beyond the ACA, and extends to other services that greatly affect the disabled community. “ must also fight to defend Medicaid against any cuts in pending budget proposals and tax plans,” Stanford explains to Bustle, “as well as state-level threats in the form of work requirements, lifetime limits, and other cruel and arbitrary restrictions.” Trump’s proposed budget plan severely slashes Medicaid, a program that not only benefits disabled people, but women and families.

The rest of the “synthetic repeal” is obscured by uncertainty, which makes it difficult for disability advocates to organize actions that subvert or protest the rollback of protections. However, non-disabled people can be allies to the disability community by continuing to educate family and friends on the importance of the ACA. “Non-disabled people need to recognize that health reform designed to be appealing to healthy people could actually be deadly for those of us who are mentally or physically ill,” adds Stanford.

The disability community is quite literally fighting for their lives in our current political climate, so non-disabled people need to step up to the plate, and help disabled advocates fight to keep basic medical protections in place. Disabled people’s access to health care should not be treated as a privilege, but a basic right.

This story originally appeared on Bustle and has been republished with permission.

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Salesforce launches $50 million Impact Fund to invest in social change startups

The Biggest Stock Collapse in World History Has No End in Sight

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It’s going to take more than the biggest stock slump in world history to convince analysts that PetroChina Co. has finally hit bottom.

Ten years after PetroChina peaked on its first day of trading in Shanghai, the state-owned energy producer has lost about $800 billion of market value -- a sum large enough to buy every listed company in Italy, or circle the Earth 31 times with $100 bills.

In current dollar terms, it’s the world’s biggest-ever wipeout of shareholder wealth. And it may only get worse. If the average analyst estimate compiled by Bloomberg proves right, PetroChina’s Shanghai shares will sink 16 percent to an all-time low in the next 12 months.

The stock has been pummeled by some of China’s biggest economic policy shifts of the past decade, including the government’s move away from a commodity-intensive development model and its attempts to clamp down on speculative manias of the sort that turned PetroChina into the world’s first trillion-dollar company in 2007.

Throw in oil’s 44 percent drop over the last 10 years and Chinese President Xi Jinping’s ambitious plans to promote electric vehicles, and it’s easy to see why analysts are still bearish. It doesn’t help that PetroChina shares trade at 36 times estimated 12-month earnings, a 53 percent premium versus global peers.

“It’s going to be tough times ahead for PetroChina,” said Toshihiko Takamoto, a Singapore-based money manager at Asset Management One, which oversees about $800 million in Asia. “Why would anyone want to buy the stock when it’s trading for more than 30 times earnings?”

Of course, many of the factors behind PetroChina’s slump have been outside the company’s control. When it listed in Shanghai in 2007, bubbles in both oil and the Chinese equity market were primed to burst, while the global financial crisis was just around the corner. Measured against the 73 percent drop in China’s CSI 300 Energy Index over the past decade, PetroChina’s 82 percent retreat doesn’t look quite so bad.

And as Citigroup Inc. analyst Nelson Wang points out, most of PetroChina’s shares are owned by the Chinese government, so the hit to minority investors hasn’t been as big as the loss in total market value might suggest.

On Hong Kong’s exchange, where PetroChina first listed in April 2000, stockholders have enjoyed strong long-term gains. The company’s so-called H shares have returned about 735 percent since their debut, outpacing the city’s benchmark Hang Seng Index by more than 500 percentage points. (Dual listings are common among Chinese companies, which often sell stock to international investors in Hong Kong.)

The H shares, which account for less than 12 percent of PetroChina’s total shares outstanding and trade at a discount to their Shanghai counterparts, may rise 31 percent over the next year, according to the latest price target from Laban Yu, a Hong Kong-based analyst at Jefferies Group LLC. PetroChina could return a “huge” amount of cash to shareholders if it decides to start spinning off pipeline assets, Yu said in an interview last week.

A spokesman for Beijing-based PetroChina declined to comment. The company on Monday reported third-quarter net income of 4.69 billion yuan ($706 million), trailing a JPMorgan Chase & Co. estimate of 7.57 billion yuan.

When it comes to PetroChina’s Shanghai-traded shares, analysts are unusually pessimistic. The energy producer is one of just a handful of large-cap Chinese companies with more sell ratings than buys, and the stock’s projected loss of 16 percent compares with an average estimated gain of about 10 percent for shares in China’s large-cap CSI 300 Index. PetroChina rose 2.1 percent in Shanghai on Monday before it announced quarterly results.

Valuation is one reason for analysts’ bearish outlook. Even after its slump, PetroChina’s forward price-to-earnings ratio in Shanghai is 80 percent higher than its historical average. And while the shares were more richly valued in 2007, it seems improbable that China’s government would allow such heady market conditions to return anytime soon. Authorities have intervened to prevent excessive swings in Chinese stocks over the past year, seeking to avoid a repeat of the boom-bust cycles that whipsawed investors in 2007 and 2015.

Even if the government does loosen its grip, today’s market darlings are more likely to be found in the technology and consumer industries than in “old economy” sectors like oil. President Xi, who cemented his status China’s strongest leader in decades at last week’s Communist Party congress, has emphasized the need for more environmentally-friendly growth. His government is rolling out one of the world’s biggest electric car programs and has pledged to cap China’s carbon emissions by 2030.

For Andrew Clarke, director of trading at Mirabaud Asia Ltd. in Hong Kong, it adds up to an uncertain outlook for China’s national oil champion. Asked whether PetroChina will ever climb back to its 2007 high, Clarke, who is 50, had this to say: “Maybe one day, but it depends how long your time frame is. I’m pretty sure I will be dead before that happens again.”

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Mark Hamill voices every character in this incredible short DC cartoon

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Mark Hamill is best known for his role as Luke Skywalker in the Star Wars franchise, but he’s also a hell of a voice actor, which is exploited wonderfully in DC Kids’ latest short cartoon.

He pulls off the feat of voicing every character in this short, each with a distinct feel even if you can hear Hamill’s voice in every performance. First, you have Hamill playing himself, the world famous actor on his way to the Gotham Conservatory. The Joker (Batman: The Animated Series) and the Trickster (both live-action Flash series), two vile villains of DC, kidnap him in hopes that they’ll be able to ransom him off.

And what happens when you put a Jokester, a Trickster, and a trollish voice actor in a car together? Plenty of chaos and meta jokes, of course—and that’s before Hamill’s fourth character arrives on the scene.

It works far better than it should, proving that if you’ve got the talent to pull it off, all you need is one good joke and your voice.

H/T Polygon

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Cam Newton apologizes for misogynistic comments, urges fans to be better than me

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A day after Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton, one of the most recognized stars in the NFL, laughed at the question of a reporter because she’s a woman, Newton apologized for his misogynistic chuckling.

On Wednesday, Charlotte Observer beat reporter Jourdan Rodrigue asked Newton a question about receiver routes, and Newton responded by saying, “It’s funny to hear a female talk about routes… It’s funny.”

👀🏈 Cam Newton: "It's funny to hear females talk about routes" http://pic.twitter.com/12OgmcuQzE

— Fanatics View (@thefanaticsview) October 4, 2017

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That led to outrage across the NFL media landscape. Rodrigue said Newton never apologized, the league said the comments were “plain wrong and disrespectful to the exceptional female reporters and all journalists who cover our league,” and Dannon yogurt—one of Newton’s major sponsors—said he would not represent the company again.

On Thursday night, Newton released this video of apology, saying he had learned a valuable lesson and urging his fans to “Don’t be like me. Be better than me.”

http://pic.twitter.com/Rwxzcu883T

— Cameron Newton (@CameronNewton) October 6, 2017

Said Newton:

“After careful thought, I understand my word choice was extremely degrading and disrespectful to women, and to be honest, that was not my intentions. And if you are a person who took offense to what I said, I sincerely apologize to you. I’m a man who tries to be a positive role model in my community and tries to use my platform to inspire others. I take ownership to everything that comes with that, and what I did was extremely unacceptable. I’m a father to two beautiful daughters, and at their age, I try to instill in them that they can do and be anything that they want to be. The fact that during this whole process, I’ve already lost sponsors and countless fans, I realize that the joke was really on me, and I’ve learned a valuable lesson from this. To the young people who see this, I hope that you learn something from this, as well. Don’t be like me. Be better than me. To the reporters, to the journalists, to the moms, super-moms, to the daughters, the sisters, and the women all around the world, I sincerely apologize and hope that you can find the kindness in your heart to forgive me. Thank you.”

But Rodrigue also found herself apologizing on Thursday after old, racially-tinged tweets resurfaced.

http://pic.twitter.com/JtVSBh1TMQ

— Leandro Dixon III (@DaHonorable49er) October 5, 2017

http://pic.twitter.com/2Up9hyhpEo

— Steven Bradley (@BradCarver25) October 5, 2017

http://pic.twitter.com/D3abYhggyH

— Jourdan Rodrigue (@JourdanRodrigue) October 5, 2017

Rodrigue reportedly posted those tweets when she was still in college. The Observer said in a statement, “We don’t condone the posts or the messages they convey. We believe Jourdan is deeply sincere in her apology and regret about those tweets.”

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The 13 Most Ridiculous Horror Movie Deaths Of All Time!

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The spooky season is upon us!

Yup, as it's Halloween time, we felt it'd be appropriate to revisit some of our favorite horror movie moments. Rather than talk about certain scary scenes from the horror genre, we have decided to celebrate the MOST RIDICULOUS deaths that have occurred.

As much as we love a good scary flick, sometimes the death scenes are just laugh out loud (AKA LOL) funny. We mean, just take a look at Johnny Depp's death in A Nightmare on Elm Street. Haven't seen it??

Oooh, ch-ch-check out the specifics (below)…

CLICK HERE to view "The 13 Most Ridiculous Horror Movie Deaths Of All Time"

First Born

Before becoming the oldest child in the family, the first born child was an only child. This means that they were given the undivided love and attention of their mothers throughout all the major milestones.

“Birth is a miraculous process, so there is a special bond between first born and the parent. They may take on the hopes and dreams of the parent, and may feel they have a sort of destiny to fulfill for them,” says Dr. Rubin.

Having the mother's undivided love and attention gives a first born child a strong sense of confidence, as they internalize their mothers desire to see them succeed.

They make great leaders, as they are given a chance to take on this role in their developmental years.

However, first born children may have difficulty letting go of parental expectations well into adulthood, molding and shaping their lives in much the same way as their mother did.

Middle Children

According to Dr. Rubin, “Middle children neither have the well-defined role of the oldest or the youngest child, and can get lost in the shuffle a bit. Their relationship to their mother is a little more difficult to define, as each case is different.”

What we do know about middle children is their lack of a defined role in the family allows more flexibility in their development. They are good negotiators, but may struggle with their sense of identity and belonging.

The mother can take on a more defined attitude with the other siblings, according to Dr. Rubin. With the oldest, she can take on the perspective of, “I don't have to worry about you,” and with the youngest, a mother tends to carry an attitude of, “you'll always be my baby” well into their adulthood.

So for the middle child, not being stuck in any defined role by a parent can be a freeing influence in their life. Middle children are more likely to go outside of the family for connections, and are more likely to move away from home in adulthood.

According to Katrin Schumann, co-author of “The Secret Power of Middle Children,”

Although middles are neglected, both by parents and researchers, they actually benefit from this in the long run. They become more independent, think outside the box, feel less pressure to conform, and are more empathetic.

This naturally leads to a more well-adjusted relationship with parents in adulthood, as middle children are less likely to take on and get stuck in one role their entire lives.

Youngest Children

From what Dr. Rubin has observed clinically, “The youngest can be viewed as the weakest in the family, and the mother can overcompensate. Mothers can make extra efforts to bolster [their youngest children], to build them up.”

The result of this, says Rubin, is that “the youngest may always feel like the youngest. They could always feel like the youngest, even when they're 38. You can hear it in the language a mother uses, always referring to the youngest as ‘my baby.'”

In cases like this, Rubin says, the youngest may grow up to be overly-dedicated to the family, using the act of giving as a pathway to love.

However, “A mother has to allow her child to raise her as well, to expand her consciousness, to grow with her kid, and this happens sometimes and sometimes doesn't,” according to Dr. Rubin.

One thing is for sure, their bond with their parents is more likely to stay very parent-child, because the youngest tends to remain feeling like the youngest their whole lives.

This can develop into an “I'll-show-them” attitude, which is both a weakness and a strength.

In their desire to stand out, to break free, younger siblings can grow up to be more carefree, easygoing, fun-loving, affectionate, sociable and funny human beings.

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The right can’t stop laughing at this old Hillary Clinton birthday tweet

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Today is Hillary Clinton‘s 70th birthday, and you would think most people in American society would be content with politely nodding at that fact and moving on with their lives.

But, boy, oh boy, would you be severely underestimating the amount of hate Hillary Clinton engenders among a good deal of conservatives.

Because they are using her birthday to drag her through the mud.

It all stems from a clunkily worded tweet sent a year ago in the run-up to the election.

Happy birthday to this future president. http://pic.twitter.com/JT3HiBjYdj

— Hillary Clinton (@HillaryClinton) October 26, 2016

It was probably a social media manager, and not Hillary herself, who posted this tweet, but anyway, she certainly thought she was going to win, as did everyone else. Not the worst tweet at the time.

But now, a year and a stunning election loss later, it’s become a Twitter meme.

Happy birthday to this future case study on how not to run a Presidential campaign. https://t.co/nemyezFybk

— Art Tavana (@arttavana) October 25, 2017

Happy birthday Hillary – I'm sorry world leaders and corrupt Governments wont be giving you birthday bribes this year, ergh I mean presents https://t.co/1As4cC70Pt

— Drew Liquerman 🇺🇸 (@DrewLiquerman) October 26, 2017

Retweeting this is set to become a yearly tradition for many on the right. https://t.co/hIwmQzzXPG

— Alec Kerrigan (@AlecKerrigan) October 25, 2017

This is what a narcissist looks like. #TrumpIsYourPresident https://t.co/LLwL5UO3rX

— Ivan Trumpovic (@RrealDJTrump) October 25, 2017

Lots of people went the “lock her up” route because that’s still a thing.

This tweet didn’t age well.

Maybe you’ll be president of your future cell block! 🔗

Enjoy your birthday while you still can Hillary. https://t.co/JVbWAn1zR9

— SL (@SLandinSoCal) October 26, 2017

You misspelled "inmate." https://t.co/f9BH9Z4bet

— Ryan Saavedra 🇺🇸 (@RealSaavedra) October 26, 2017

😂😂😂😂You mispelled Convict. https://t.co/hpnWTM90wH

— Jack (@railboy63) October 26, 2017

Actually, happy birthday to this future felon. https://t.co/ByPBFUg8wx

— David Wohl (@DavidWohl) October 26, 2017

Some wanted Trump to troll his former opponent, a task he’s never shied away from.

If Trump retweets this tomorrow, I'll give $1000 to a worthy charity.

Add your own donation pledges in the thread. 😄 https://t.co/FKpbxG6n4r

— Paul Joseph Watson (@PrisonPlanet) October 25, 2017

Man @realDonaldTrump HAS to retweet this today https://t.co/3PpSYdJ96i

— Comfortably Smug (@ComfortablySmug) October 26, 2017

Some were just surprised her social media manager left it up.

I'm shocked she never deleted this one. https://t.co/5ka2DtVlLH

— Mary Elizabeth (@mchastain81) October 26, 2017

How has this not been deleted? LMAO https://t.co/aGGUzru1hZ

— Bottom-atic Fav (@_hoemo) October 26, 2017

Even Julian Assange got in on it because that dude has nothing else left to do but tweet.

What happened? Narcissistic entitlement.https://t.co/eyoRns14lp

— Julian Assange 🔹 (@JulianAssange) October 25, 2017

Anyway, while Clinton has categorically denied she will run again for president, it would be funny if she ran again, won, and then RT’ed the shit out of this from her desk at the Oval Office on Oct. 21, 2021.

That would be the ultimate own.

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Woman requests time off for mental health, boss sends the perfect reply

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It's been almost three months since the news that Linkin Park's Chester Bennington died by suicide, and the tributes and comments about the lead singer are still pouring in.

Before his death, Bennington, along with two members of the band, filmed an episode of Apple Music's Carpool Karaoke.

That video was finally shared on Thursday with the blessings of Bennington's family and friends, and is 23 minutes of pure joy with comedian Ken Jeong, a big fan of the band.

The four men rip through Linkin Park classics, an Outkast song, "screaning" lessons (that's scream singing), a dance break and more. Because this goes beyond the James Corden segments that started the carpool movement, the group goes on a karaoke bus for even more antics.

Fans of Bennington and the band were thrilled, and emotional, about the new video.

Watching #linkinpark #CarpoolKaraoke + how happy Chester looks! That episode made me laugh so much thanks @kenjeong @linkinpark #Ripchester

— Chris O (@pugster206) October 12, 2017

Omg Chester b’s singing. No one in the world is like him or can ever replace him. 💔

— Lake (@lakeaspen1987) October 12, 2017

Thanks for streaming, they all enjoyed themselves especially Chester. Lovely to watch with mixed emotions but Fucking AWESOME! 🤜🏻 x 🔥

— Susie 💫 (@Buzzle_70) October 12, 2017

"Everyone at home watching should all sing along," Bennington says at the end.

What are you waiting for?

If you want to talk to someone or are experiencing suicidal thoughts, text the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. For international resources, this list is a good place to start.

WATCH: Woman requests time off for mental health, boss sends the perfect reply

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Vegetarian sandwich recipe/healthy evening snacks/indian breakfast recipes/kids lunch box snack idea

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[ ]Healthy Veg sandwich recipes,quick and easy to make Indian bread vegetarian breakfast/lunch/dinner/brunch tea time snacks of evening.Homemade vegetable sandwich bread recipe for kids.This potato,paneer and bread vegetarian sandwich is toasted on tawa/pan/griddle. This Indian style quick and easy veg snacks recipe is one of the famous/popular tea time evening snacks which can be made at home. It’s best evening refreshments dish and easy kids snacks too. This healthy veggie sandwich is great for breakfast or brunch. This is an Indian style quick and easy tiffin box recipe, kids love to carry for school lunch. Children also enjoy this favorite breakfast. This is one of the best kids food dish idea to keep them happy and smiling. This is also very famous kids recipe and can be given in their tiffin box too. Serve hot with your favorite sauce/ketchup. You can also carry this veg sandwich for your picnic. This Indian veg sandwich recipe is a healthier substitute tea time snack or could also be served as evening snack.
Ingredients:
8 wheat bread slices
1 small chopped onion
¼ chopped green bell pepper (capsicum)
120 grams paneer (Indian cottage cheese)
50 grams cilantro (coriander) leaves
2 medium boiled potatoes
½ cup boiled green peas
1 small green chili
1 tsp chaat masala
1/8 tsp black pepper powder
¼ tsp lemon juice
½ inch ginger
¼ cup mozzarella cheese (optional)
1 big clove of garlic
Salt to taste

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Patients ‘need rest, not antibiotics’

Astronaut approves of 4-year-old’s costume re-creation of his classic dog portrait

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Virginia dad Andrew Miller’s 4-year-old daughter only had one demand for her Halloween costume this year: She wanted to be “that funny astronaut.”

The man she was referring to is Leland Melvin, an engineer and now-retired NASA astronaut whose 2009 work portrait went viral for featuring his two happy rescue dogs, Jake and Scout. It is, quite simply, the most relaxed an astronaut has ever looked while wearing a space suit. But according to Melvin, getting the original picture taken was a production—he had to sneak them into the building since pets weren’t allowed on the NASA premises.

“I had a van and I drove the dogs in,” Melvin told Gizmodo earlier this year. “NASA doesn’t allow dogs to be on-site, so when I showed them my NASA badge, I kept the window up…and I had the stereo blasting because the dogs were barking. So I gunned it and the didn’t chase me or anything.”

When he got to Studio 8 at the Johnson Space Center, Melvin reportedly took Jake and Scout up the back stairs and into photoshoot area.

“I had all these dog bones, and they were just sitting there eating the bones, just grubbin’ and happy,” he said. “The dogs just ran over to me. And the guy who took the picture… ‘Dude, start shooting!’” And the rest is history.

Miller and his daughter set out to re-create the photo shoot on their front stoop this weekend with a little help from their family dog. He tweeted the final results:

Me: What do you want to be for Halloween? My 4 y/o: That funny astronaut. Me: I got you, girl! (cc @Astro_Flow) http://pic.twitter.com/0eHI9HbMGm

— Andrew Miller (@AndrewCMiller) October 29, 2017

Off the power of its cuteness alone, the photo got some traction on Twitter. It found its way to Melvin’s mentions, and he gave the costume his official seal of approval.

This image warms my heart. So appreciative of you getting the shot I got many years ago. Thank you. 🚀🚀 https://t.co/gsTq8yq4n1

— Leland Melvin (@Astro_Flow) October 29, 2017

“This image warms my heart,” Melvin wrote. “So appreciative of you getting the shot I got many years ago.”

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Monday, October 30, 2017

Will & Grace’s Sean Hayes Reveals His Recent Health Scare To Ellen DeGeneres!

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How does Sean Hayes make even the most serious thing sound funny??

While talking to

The Will & Grace star revealed how his small intestine burst open only two or three weeks ago, but thankfully doctors were able to quickly clip it back together. He shared:

"I went to bed at night and all the sudden I felt this excruciating pain in my stomach. I went to the E.R. and thank God I did."

We're so glad he did!! And we're so glad he got to come back on Ellen's show!

You can watch him recall the scary incident (above), and how he taught her how to suck balls!

The 15 best Rick and Morty quotes

1)

Rick: Listen, Jerry, I don’t want to overstep my bounds or anything. It’s your house. It’s your world. You’re a real Julius Caesar, but I’ll tell you some, tell you how-how I feel about school, Jerry. It’s a waste of time, a bunch of people running around, bumping into each other. G-guy up front says, “two plus two.” The people in the back say, “four.” Then the bell rings, and they give you a carton of milk and a piece of paper that says you can take a dump or something. I mean, it’s—it’s not a place for smart people, Jerry, and I know that’s not a popular opinion, but it’s my two cents on the issue.

Episode: “Pilot”

Why: Within the first few minutes of Rick and Morty’s adventures, the audience is immediately made aware of two things. One, Rick does not respect the standard order of our society and two, he holds us all in contempt. What at first appears to be a funny riff about outsider culture quickly becomes the foundation of the show. Nothing is as it seems and the people who live their lives respecting the standard order will soon learn the impact of their choices.

Screengrab via YouTube

2)

Child Morty Jr.: I mean, you know, I—I don’t want to shoot nobody.
Rick: They’re just robots, Morty! It’s OK to shoot them! They’re robots!
Guard #1: Aah! My leg is shot off!
Guard #2: Glenn’s bleeding to death!
Child Morty Jr.: Someone call his wife and children!
Child Morty Jr.: They’re not robots, Rick!
Rick: It’s a figure of speech, Morty. They’re bureaucrats. I don’t respect them.

Episode: “Pilot”

Why: Episode 1 probably wasn’t the first time Morty had to kill an innocent to help his grandpa, but it sure as hell wouldn’t be his last. This quote serves one purpose, letting the audience know the only absolute truth in a Rick and Morty episode is that nothing can be trusted and every twist comes with a dark punch.

Photo via Giphy

3)

Snuffles: Tell me, Summer, if a human was born with stumpy legs, would they breed it with another deformed human and put their children on display like the Dachshund?

Episode: “Lawnmower Dog”

Why: Loving Rick and Morty means asking the difficult questions. Questions like, “Would our pets breed us in horrifying configurations if we were effing adorable?” The answer is obviously yes.

Photo via Giphy

4)

Rick: Ruben’s seen some rough years, Morty. You don’t agree to get a theme park built inside you if your life is going great.

Episode: “Anatomy Park”

Why: Rick’s moral relativism becomes something of a running theme throughout the series, but this is the first example of him using people as an actual ecosystem for his experiments. In the context of this episode, the line is a funny aside meant to comfort Morty’s morals, but taken as a part of the whole series it’s a hysterical example of how Rick can convince himself even the most selfish actions are for the greater good.

Photo via Rick and Morty Wiki

5)

Mr. Meeseeks: Having a family doesn’t mean that you stop being an individual. You know the best thing you can do for the people that depend on you? Be honest with them, even if it means setting them free.

Episode: “Meeseeks and Destroy”

Why: Mr. Meeseeks is an alien species that only exists until they’ve solved your problem. There’s no ambiguity to their existence. They can only disappear when they’ve completed their task—in this case, Beth’s request to be a complete woman. Beth’s discontent is planted during this season 1 conversation, but it takes until the beginning of season 3 to come to a head. In the interim, the seemingly irreparable riff in Beth and Jerry’s marriage becomes a focal point in the series. We would support a relationship talk show hosted by Mr. Meeseeks nonetheless.

5)

Rick: Listen, Morty, I hate to break it to you, but what people call “love” is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. It hits hard, Morty, then it slowly fades, leaving you stranded in a failing marriage. I did it. Your parents are gonna do it. Break the cycle, Morty. Rise above. Focus on science.

Episode: “Rick Potion #9”

Why: It’s interesting in retrospect that Rick and Morty has attracted so many nihilistic fans. This line from season 1 isn’t an example of Rick’s brilliance, but his cowardice: He’s a mad scientist who can face every horror in the universe except his actions. Rick’s quest to make Morty into the protege he could never create in Beth is a theme throughout the series, but this moment exemplifies the power of the show. Lots of viewers saw this and thought, “yeah, that’s me,” instead of “oh shit, that’s me.” Sometimes the clearest expressions of Rick’s pain aren’t his confessions but his defenses of his terrible ideas.

Screengrab via YouTube

6)

Morty: Rick, what about the reality we left behind?

Rick: What about the reality where Hitler cured cancer? Just don’t think about it, Morty.

Episode: “Rick Potion #9”

Why: Normally when a cartoon says “don’t think about it,” it’s a throwaway gag about continuity. In the case of Rick and Morty, this is a terrifying look into how callously Rick views life in the rest of the multiverse. There’s always another universe if you destroy this one. Thinking about what could have been is simply a waste of time.

Photo via Giphy

7)

Summer: “Why are you fighting? Can’t you see you’re all the same?”
Morty: “Oh Summer, first race war, huh?”

Episode: “Auto-Erotic Assimilation”

Why: Sometimes the darkest jokes on Rick and Morty are just simple observations about civilization. This is one of its funniest.

Photo via Giphy

8)

Blim Blam: Um, first of all, hello. Uh, my name is Blim Blam the Korblok. Second of all, cards on the table, I’m a murderer that eats babies, and I came to this planet to eat babies. However, I am also carrying a highly infectious disease that I suppose you could call “space AIDS” as you put it, and Rick did chain me up so that he could attempt to cure it. At the same time, Rick’s motivation to cure my disease was not to save my life or anyone else’s, but to patent and sell the cure for billions of Blemflarcks. But you know the reason why I ripped my chains out of the wall? And do you know why I’m never coming back to this planet?! BECAUSE THE TWO OF YOU ARE THE FUCKING WORST! You both hate yourselves AND each other! And the idea that it has ANYTHING to do with Rick is laughable. I’d laugh but I’m biologically incapable. That’s how alien I am! And even I’m sitting here listening to the two of you and being like, “WHAT THE FUCK!?!” So good luck with your shitty marriage, and tell Rick I’m sorry he has to deal with EITHER of you. Blim Blam OUT. You know what? I’m taking this.

Episode: “Auto Erotic Assimilation”

Why: There’s nothing worse than when someone else figures out your relationship is over before you. Especially if your relationship is the worst thing they’ve ever witnessed in a galaxy full of terror.

Screengrab via YouTube

9)

Jessica’s Friend: I want that docking kind of love. Like penis in the foreskin kind of love. Like warm…

Episode: “Rest and Ricklaxation”

Why: Say this out loud with an aspirational sigh, and tell us you don’t want this kind of love either.

10)

Morty : Well then get your shit together, get it all together, and put it in a backpack, all your shit, so it’s together.

And if you gotta take it somewhere, take it somewhere, you know. Take it to the shit store and sell it, or put it in the shit museum. I don’t care what you do, you just gotta get it together.

Get your shit together.

Episode: “Big Trouble in Little Sanchez”

Why: Sure, in the episode Morty is wrong, but we’ve all had a moment where we’ve wanted to shake someone until they got their shit together. Morty just finds the most ineloquently profane way to say it.

11)

Morty: That, out there, that’s my grave.
Summer: Wait, what?
Morty: On one of our adventures, Rick and I basically destroyed the whole world, so we bailed on that reality and we came to this one, because in this one, the world wasn’t destroyed, and in this one, we were dead. So we came here and we buried ourselves, and we took their place. And every morning, Summer, I eat breakfast 20 yards away from my own rotting corpse.
Summer: So you’re not my brother?
Morty: I’m better than your brother. I’m a version of your brother you can trust when he says “Don’t run.” Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody’s gonna die. Come watch TV.

Episode: “Rixty Minutes”

Why: Fans’ desire to turn Rick and Morty into a philosophy lesson instead of a cartoon is occasionally grating, but when the show has moments like this, you start to understand why. We may not all have access to alternate dimensions, but even in our day to day lives, the reality that we all need to create a reason to exist instead of waiting for the universe to hand us meaning is a haunting thought. If that doesn’t describe you, congratulations on not being haunted by existence. For the rest of us, this is a moment of beautiful comfort.

12)

Butter robot: What is my purpose?
Rick: You pass butter.
Butter robot: Oh my god.
Rick: Yeah, welcome to the club, pal.

Episode: “Something Ricked This Way Comes”

Why: The idea of why anyone exists regularly comes up Rick and Morty, whether characters live to power a battery or pass butter. In four short lines, this scene provides a horrific one-act play about our purpose in the universe. (That emotionally defeated robot is also super relatable).

Photo by Giphy

13)

Birdperson: Morty, do you know what “wubba lubba dub dub” means?
Morty: Uh, that’s just Rick’s stupid nonsense catchphrase.
Birdperson: It’s not nonsense at all. In my people’s tongue it means, “I am in great pain, please help me.”

Episode: “Ricky Business”

Why: Leave it to Birdperson to pull on your heartstrings while revealing the sobering backstory behind a catchphrase printed on a million t-shirts.

Photo via Giphy

14)

Summer: What do you mean you’re having a party? Are some Glip-Glops from the third dimension going to come over and play cards or something?
Rick: “Glip Glop?” You’re lucky a Traflorkian doesn’t hear you say that.
Summer: Is that like their N-word?
Rick: It’s like the N-word and the C-word had a baby and it was raised by all the bad words for Jews.

Episode: “Ricky Business”

Why: Remember folks, don’t riff on another language until you’re positive you know what you’re saying.

Photo via Giphy

15)

Rick: There’s pros and cons to every alternate timeline. Fun facts about this one: It’s got giant, telepathic spiders, eleven 9/11s, and the best ice cream in the multiverse!

Episode: “The Ricks Must Be Crazy”

Why: Rick and Morty occasionally dips into cosmic horror, which is fitting given that Cthulu itself appears in the opening credits. As callous as Rick seems here, it’s important for him to be able to find the bright side in any reality he encounters, particularly the ones where awful things have happened. Afterall, if you knew the secrets of the universe and the horrors it held, wouldn’t you risk dealing with telepathic spiders for the best ice cream ever?

Photo via YouTube

Editor’s note: This article is regularly updated for relevance.

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The 15 best Rick and Morty quotes

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