Friday, October 20, 2017

Taylor Swift Is Back On Her Bullshit

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It’s been a quiet few weeks on the Taylor-Swift-Doing-The-Absolute-Most-O-Meter (patent pending), but that’s about to end. Her new album comes out in less than a month, which means she’ll be putting in overtime at being the absolute worst. She’s already been hard at work on her next music video, which will apparently portray her as some London girl that we definitely wouldn’t get along with. 

The London aesthetic is reportedly inspired by Joe Alwyn, the dude who Taylor is dating right now. Joe is basically a random hot British actor (who still lives with his parents—what a catch), and they’ve somehow managed to keep their relationship quiet for the past six months or so, probably by living in one of Tupac's caves or something. Don’t know, don’t care.

Anyway, Taylor is continuing her questionable trend of completely changing her style/personality based on who she’s dating, and this new video will see her out and about at lots of London spots that she and Joe have experienced together in the whole six or so months they've been together. She was spotted riding a bus (wow, so relatable), riding a bike across a bridge, and visiting a kebab shop, all while shooting for the video. To be honest, we’re surprised Taylor eats kebabs, because she seems like more of a salad with no dressing kind of girl, but everyone has a wild side. 

A source close to Taylor Swift (our sincerest condolences) told that Taylor "wants to show people she is just a normal girl," which actually is fair because we all have that one friend who meets a guy and gets obsessed with him immediately, starts posting about him everywhere on social media, and shows up to his job all the time to randomly surprise him with gifts, only to go all scorched Earth on him two weeks later when he won't introducer her to his mom.

Anyway, in some of the photos from the set, Taylor was wearing a gold chain and a shirt with a snake on it, because of course. She’s really latched onto this whole snake thing, and she obviously thinks it makes her really cool and chill and funny and clever, when it honestly just makes her look desperate and tired. Someone needs to tell Taylor that it's not inventive to simply acknowledge that you're aware of the bad things people say about you—it just means you aren't completely brain dead. Until Taylor provides some interesting spin on her reputation, or tries to combat it in some significant way, or goes even one step above just restating what everyone's been saying about her for years, we're not interested.

It’s unclear when the new video will be about, but it most likely goes along with the song “Ready For It,” which is arguably even more heinous than the incredibly heinous “Look What You Made Me Do” because the former includes Taylor rapping. Can’t wait for the album!!

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